redirected

today i was suppose to arrive at the airport with bags packed and passport in hand.

today i was suppose to sit with other team members on a 15 hour plane ride to Kiev,Ukraine.

today i battled the emotions knowing they were leaving and i was staying.

i wonder if i made the right decision?
i wonder if i will miss out on a life changing experience?
i wonder what's the reason for me not going?

in the midst of battling the emotions and the questions, i realized that i have to trust the One who knows the plan over mine. i can try to create this wonderful idea and get all the details worked out in my head on what i am going to do and where i will go. however, every time i take a step in that direction i get redirected. not completely, but just a different route then what i was suspecting. change is hard. even a slight change can cause you to do a little reevaluation.

knowing our team from church is in route to Kiev, i feel more responsible to pray for them and for what God has in store for each member as they step foot unto the soil of Ukraine. for them...the soil has been prepared. it is ready to receive them. in obedience to the Lord, i know now that it was not for me to go with them. i need and want to pass the torch along. i choose to be a doorholder for those who have not ventured outside their comfort zone to see all that God has waiting for them.

i also know, the soil for where i am to go is being prepared. it is being cultivated and enriched. i can't wait to step foot in the place God alone has prepared for me. i feel it's coming soon...