we are officially in the process of looking for our "first house". it's honestly surreal to be at this stage of finding a place you will probably raise a family in. woah, did i just say that!?! am i really old enough to be at this season in life? i just got married and i'm just now getting used to this whole "how to be a good & godly wife thing". i still have to pinch myself to remind myself that i've been married for 10 months now. wow!
i feel so lucky to have my man. he has dealt with a lot of me since saying i-do and it's been embarrassing to think back on certain moments. he loves me through my mood swings, tears, frustration, rude comments, anger and much more. i'm thankful he still likes me after all of that. :)
okay, back to houses...our house hunting actually started back in the fall when we would search via trulia or zillow, but we knew coming back from our christmas break we needed to put some feet to our searching. so after talking with my awesome brother-in-law who is a real state agent, we began the journey. to best sum up the process, it's a giant puzzle! you are trying to find all different criteria and match it together. hmm...much easier said than done. we know we won't be in our dream house, but we want to be in a house we love and can envision raising children in. so then the questions come...how many bedrooms? bathrooms? square foot? lot size? neighborhood location or geographical location around the city? how far is the drive from work? are there nearby parks or rec centers? will the house appreciate over the years? will it be a good resale house in the future? do we buy low and put in upgrades? or do we buy higher with less projects? will the neighborhood be safe for our kids one day?
now the questions begin to shift. once you get married you consistently think of your other half and their likes and dislikes. a very humbling sate of mine. in addition, to imagine kids in a particular neighborhood is stretching me. which makes me even wonder..what will their generation be like? the culture? our society? who will their friends be? how will we be as parents? etc...and then my insecurity rises further....will i be a good parent? can i really take on the responsibility as a parent in taking full care of a child? will they like me? i know i don't have the ability to do any of these things. i'm scared half to death, but excited for the adventure whenever God decides it's best for us to really parent. that's just it though. in my timing, i know i will never feel "responsible or capable or adequate enough for it" but He will equip me with the tools. He will give me the skills, the energy, the knowledge, the discernment, the wisdom or knowing of how to do it and when to do it. whew. for now though, i get to focus on where that could all start..."the first sugg shack"
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